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The Neurotics

They are more common than you think

· Happiness,Success

Rare are the people who:

  • have a healthy taste for novelty and adventure;
  • view each day with a fresh pair of lens;
  • experience the same activity differently no matter how many times it has been repeated; and
  • see each new encounter as what it is - with no preconception or lack of interest.

This is a more healthy perspective and experience of Life and as such, should be the norm.

Except it isn't.

The average persons perhaps have varying degree of neurosis that hamper their ability to see reality for what it is but are often clouded by what they think it is.

Neurotics are not emotionally sick; they are cognitively wrong

Neurosis is a result of chronic distress. It does not cause delusions or hallucinations but it does affect people's ability to have an accurate perception of reality and cause them to adopt maladaptive coping strategies that are driven by fear or anxiety.

The people who:

  • are prone to believe in conspiracy theories...
  • believe the future is bleak because the past was...
  • paint an overall grim and ugly perception of the World...
  • believe any attempt of trying to change things would be futile...

most probably think so because of their neurosis and not because it is the reality.

Such persons believe that the past is an accurate basis for the prediction of the future. Because their past experiences were bad, they believe the future will be bad too. As such, it affects their perception of Life, themselves and others in general, and result in them making poor decisions for themselves, and sabotaging their own success and happiness.

They typically distrust others and have many fears, and see little or no reason for hope and optimism.

They cannot experience happiness not because they are emotionally sick but because they are cognitively wrong.

We ought to ask, why does the same life form have such disparate perceptions of Life? While some see beauty, love, opportunities and abundance amongst the ugly, cruel, challenges and constraints, some see only the latter.

Being overly cautious is not wisdom; giving chance where it deserves is

The neurotics may justify the reason for their mindset as having learnt their lessons well and have become wiser. But I would argue that this is wisdom. For if it is wisdom, they would have been liberated by it, not suffer because of it.

They have kept themselves within the walls that they have built to protect themselves, and keep themselves from not just the bad but also the good and the great. Yet, they will still experience the bad. Consequently, the narrative that the World is an awful place and that they have had a bad lot in Life becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

On the flip side, the persons who are willing to give each new day and each new person the chance to demonstrate that it is different from the last, will have a more balanced and accurate perception of Life. Such persons may have encountered bad but they stay open to receive the good and the great that will eventually show up in the future, which will then prove them right and reinforce their reasons for hope and optimism.

The neurotics, if able to recognise the flaws in their perceptions and be willing to give Life a chance to prove them wrong, will then be able to experience Life in a more balanced manner and make better decisions...

They may then have a chance to experience success and happiness, which has up till now eluded them.

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